You'll be in my heart

Studying his ball (3 months)

The other day Robbie, Meo and I were in the car listening to the Disney Pandora station when the song "You'll Be In My Heart" came on. This song has never really affected me before, but listening to it then brought tears to my eyes. I was so touched.

 "You'll Be In My Heart"

Phil Collins

Come stop your crying
It will be all right
Just take my hand Hold it tight

I will protect you
from all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry

For one so small,
you seem so strong
My arms will hold you,
keep you safe and warm
This bond between us
Can't be broken
I will be here
Don't you cry

'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more

You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart, always

Why can't they understand
the way we feel
They just don't trust
what they can't explain
I know we're different but,
deep inside us
We're not that different at all

And you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more

Don't listen to them
'Cause what do they know
We need each other,
to have, to hold
They'll see in time
I know

When destiny calls you
You must be strong
I may not be with you
But you've got to hold on
They'll see in time
I know
We'll show them together

'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on,
Now and forever more

Oh, you'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be in my heart, always
Always

Before I married Robbie, I was pretty wild. I would drive 120 miles per hour on the highway and I would jump off cliffs into the water without a care. The longer I was with Robbie though, the less reckless I became. I'm not sure if part of it was just getting older, but I think I began to value my life more. Not that I didn't value my life before, but I started to feel the need to be especially careful. And I wanted him to be careful too. I couldn't imagine my life without him, and I didn't want either of us to endanger ourselves. We still know how to have fun and still have our share of wild and crazy times; but it's different than it used to be. And you know what? I don't mind one bit.

Since Mattimeo was born I have undergone yet another transformation. I knew that I would love him. I always imagined I would. But I never knew I would love him this much. How could I know? You just can't, until you hold that baby that you grew inside you and see him look into your eyes. You just can't know; only imagine. I feel like this love has made me even more animalistic; I feel fiercely protective of him. Not in a way that I feel like I need to shelter him; I know how important it is for him to learn and grow through trying things on his own and learning from his mistakes. But I cannot imagine anything happening to him. I feel like I would rip someone apart if they ever tried to hurt him. He is so innocent, pure and beautiful; I want so much for him to always find happiness in simple things and not be tainted by greed, anger or violence. I know he will have exposure to these things, but I want so much to be there to teach him that he can rise above all that stuff. That he can understand the corruption in this world without being apart of it. I want him to grow up at peace with himself and to feel loved, and to be able to help share that peace and love with others; to be sympathetic and understanding. I pray that I can be a good role model for him and keep him safe. I love him fiercely. Who wouldn't love this stud "puffin" though?